What do you do after a long day of standing in the mud listening to bands whose lack of talent is compensated by extreme volume, drinking beer at body temperature and eating undercooked hamburgers? You retire to your tent at the festival camping area to get some peace and quiet.
At least, that’s what you wish you could do. Because within a few metres of every tent there’s an asshole with a guitar who paid an expensive festival ticket, but spends the whole day sitting on a coolbox hoping for passing talent scouts that cannot find the stage.
These are the dreaded Camping Area Buskers, which crawl around the outskirts of every festival just to be able to say something like “I played at Roskilde last summer”. Their repertoire ranges from bad covers of bands that play at the festival and the entire “Nirvana Unplugged in New York” album. And that’s if you are lucky, because some of them feel the urge to play their own songs.
The main reason earplugs are sold at festivals is not because of the damage the volume of hip bands can do to your hearing, but to protect you from having to hear buskers at the camping ground. It is strongly advised to use them. If you are a camping busker yourself, make sure people have earplugs in, because this may keep you from getting beat up by a drunken German.
Some other words of advise:
– Camping Area Buskers don’t make friends at summer festivals
– Make out 75% of the people in the First Aid Tent
– Never, ever (really never) was a singer that plays on the main stage of a festival discovered by a talent scout while playing besides his tent the previous summer.
– Make sure people don’t know which is your tent, because it will be the target of flying beer cans, bonfires, vomit and muddy combat boots.
That said… have a great festival summer!