If You… Then You’re Not Really A Busker, But…

Posted: July 17, 2009 in Read "The Busker's Handbook"

IF YOU

THEN YOU’RE NOT A BUSKER, BUT

  • sell homeburned cd’s

an unsuccesful singer/songwriter

  • play a guitar that costs more
  • then you make after busking for a week

a rich kid using you’re parents’ money to rebel against their capitalist lifestyle

  • have knowledge of diminished and augmented chords

a jazz musician who’s afraid to play in dark smoke-filled basements
  • only play in weekends, because you also have a week job

an attention whore with misguided dreams of future fame

  • don’t play any songs but just strum on an untuned guitar with only 3 strings

too proud to admit you’re a common beggar

  • feel proud being an urban musician

a fake bohemian who has to wake up to reality

  • try to get a message across about peace/politics/the environment/vegetarianism/the age of aquarius/…

you’re giving people who really work for the good of the planet a bad name and probably under 18 or over 50 (you old hippie)

  • refer to busking as a solo side-project

thrown out of every band you ever played in and forced to beg for an audience on the street

  • busk to recapture the magic of the old days when you weren’t famous yet

a has-been craving for public approval, who wasted all the money he earned during his fifteen minutes of fame, ten years ago

  • announce every song you’re going to play

having illusions of an interested audience

  • take regular breaks and just sit on you’re guitar case

possibly using busking as a cover to sell weed

  • wear T-shirts of you’re favourite band

making a misplaced statement about musical culture, while serving as a living merchandise display

  • use amplifiers and effects

a show-off hoping to score chicks and an invitation to audition for a stadium-filling rock band

  • try to let people notice your busking performance by wearing weird clothes and make-up

a musical clown that gets thrown out of kid’s birthday parties by parents who fear you might be a paedophile

  • play the same segment of one song over and over again and not even proper

not allowed to rehearse at home because your roommates think it’s annoying

  • are not in it for the money

an undercover journalist preparing a pulitzer price winning article on urban decay or a method actor preparing for a role in an independent art house film

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